Furniture Shopping Hell Redux
Stuff I hate November 26th, 2007Because we apparently angered the furniture gods, Dave and I are still having problems with our living room. In this case, it’s a problem with our lamps. More on that in a minute.
I promised an update on the state of the living room. Here it is:
When we bought our couch and chair (the one with the black cat on it), we realized that they needed to be separated by lots of space. It looked too cramped with everything on one side of our small room. The coffee table is now scratched beyond recognition because of the trouble-making cat you see on the couch, so now it serves as our TV stand.
And yes, that’s a teddy bear sitting next to him. It belongs to the third cat, Stinky (not pictured). Yeah, my cats have favorite stuffed animals. Got a problem with that?
With the set now split apart, we needed something to bridge the canyon in the middle of the room, so we threw down a rug and pulled the red chair in from another room.
Yes, we know it looks like we were inebriated when we set it up like this, but it fits our style and we don’t mind that the colors don’t match. We’re choosing to call this look drunken feng shui eclectic.
So what’s up with the lamps? Long story. It involves a set of brass balls.
We bought two lamps (you see only one here) from a place about 20 miles from home. It was a pain in the butt to drive there, but we’d spent weeks on an unsuccessful hunt for a specific kind of brass lamp, and we got it on good authority that this place would have what we wanted.
Turns out they had tons of brass lamps in their showroom, but we ultimately went with a catalog order because it offered brass lamps with pull chains instead of on/off knobs. We insisted on pull chains with brass balls hanging from them. But ordering from a catalog meant a six week wait.
Six weeks finally came and Dave picked up the lamps and brought them home. We ordered two of the same one. And why do I want to kill people now? They didn’t match. One set of balls was smaller than the other set. So we hiked back to the lamp store and plopped them down on the counter.
"Hi. We bought these lamps and they don’t match. See how the pull chains are different? These balls are smaller than those balls. Plus they hang crooked. And when you pull on one, the chain grinds."
"I see."
"And one of the sockets is broken. The bulb won’t light."
"OK."
"And see how the shine is duller on this one versus the other?"
"Uh-hmm."
We expected to hear "We’re sorry. We’ll order another one." Instead we got "Hmmm, not sure what I can do here."
"Say what?"
"They were imported. I’m going to have to let the company know. They might not even know they’re having a problem."
Still taking in the part about "not sure I what we can do here," I almost missed that last little nugget "…they’re having a problem" as in, she didn’t feel she had any responsibility to make things right. Lady, it’s not the company who has a problem. You have a problem. Me.
She said she’d call today and let me know what the company can do for us. Said she’d order another set and maybe they’d come in identical.
What. The. Hell.
"Maybe they’ll come in as a matched set? I don’t understand."
"Sometimes this happens with lamp manufacturers. You can’t guarantee that if you order two, they’ll be identical." She even had the nerve to say "If you hadn’t seen the two mismatched ones together, you wouldn’t even have noticed the brass balls were wrong if they’d both come in with the balls you don’t like."
"But we ordered the lamp with the bigger balls. They look better than the smaller balls. We want the bigger balls."
I asked her to cancel the replacement order. Fine. And why am I still cranky about this? Because we’re total idiots and left the lamp shades at home and now we have to drive another 40 miles to return them. We thought they would just replace the lamps and so we didn’t think to take the shades with us.
So now we’re just hoping the stupid lamp store will reimburse us at 100%. And I’m hoping a place that sells the brass lamps with big balls will come to me in a vision. We are angry and still lampless. Will someone please throw us a bone?
All we wanted was nice, normal furniture and lamps with balls that match. We do not know what we’ve done to deserve this. A friend of mine said he recently had to replace his furniture and he and his wife went to ONE store and picked out things they liked in TWENTY MINUTES. I hate him and I hope all his stuff falls apart the day after his warranty runs out.
UPDATE 11/27: Dave dropped off the shades today and we got a full credit for everything. We’re back to square one again, but at least the nonsense with the lamp store is over!
Stumble it!
November 27th, 2007 at 1:12 am
Boy, that saleswoman had some balls, didn’t she? How do people get away with that? Good luck with finding a pair of identical lamps that are…identical. I never realized it could be so difficult!
November 27th, 2007 at 1:14 am
I forgot to say:
“drunken feng shui eclectic”
HEE!
November 27th, 2007 at 2:08 am
JD — She was horrible in person and on the phone. There was no reasoning with her. We dread the last visit to return the shades. We feel like speeding by their place and throwing them from the car window into the parking lot. We don’t need your stinking shades! But we HAVE to go in to get our money back. Gonna be a real fun visit.
November 27th, 2007 at 3:02 am
So you were deliberately trolling for someone as sophomoric as me to leave an adolescent comment about your usage of balls?
“These balls are smaller than those balls.” and “..they hang crooked.”
Uh uh. Sorry sister – I’m not falling for it. Nice try though.
November 27th, 2007 at 3:59 am
Jeff beat me to the balls comments.
And that is just the type of shopping experience I would have. Glad to know someone else shares my luck with shopping.
November 27th, 2007 at 6:49 am
If everything went right, what on earth would you have to write about!
I really don’t understand how places like that stay in business. I hope they make it right by you.
November 27th, 2007 at 10:54 am
@ Jeff — Be glad I left the title the way it is. It could have been so much worse.
@ Margaret — I hate shopping. Big ticket items, small ticket items. Doesn’t matter. I have the worst luck.
@ Moonshadow — Clearly I would have NOTHING to write about. I’m wronged just about every other day. Pray we get all our money back. I have a bad feeling about it. Saleswoman said we would, but I don’t trust her.
November 27th, 2007 at 1:12 pm
“I hate him and I hope all his stuff falls apart the day after his warranty runs out.”
🙂
Problem with that statement is – we bought the lifetime warranty. We’re replacing because of what the dogs did, and I won’t have that happen again.
So, I guess what I’m saying is that it’s OK if it falls apart the day after I die. What will I care? 🙂
November 27th, 2007 at 1:24 pm
Kathy-
I don’t know if you have ever been in a BomBay store, but they have filed for Bankruptcy liquidation and are emptying the inventory from their Breiningsville Warehouse into their East Coast stores. Maybe you can get matching brass lamps you like there, at a markdown.
November 27th, 2007 at 1:59 pm
“Plus they hang crooked. And when you pull on one, the chain grinds.”
OW!
(sorry!)
November 27th, 2007 at 2:02 pm
@ Grant — The furniture gods have been very good to you and so smart of you to go with the lifetime warranty. Will you help me find lamps now? Pretty please?!?! I need some of your good aura.
@ Anonymous — Thanks for the tip! I’ll check that out. It cannot possibly hurt.
November 27th, 2007 at 4:19 pm
While I hate to say this……this is all your fault. You mistakenly believed that the people you were dealing with were competent and customer oriented. This is a fallacy these days. No merchant is competent. Their watch-word regarding profits is volume and turnover, not quality.
The cost to you in gas and time wasted driving to and from the store probably negates the value of the lamps.
If you have the money, the only way to have quality work done is to have something custom made by an artisan. If you don’t have the money, you need to learn to make it yourself.
Everything in between usually involves morons and you will just waste money and get frustrated.
November 27th, 2007 at 4:48 pm
I’m gonna take a chance and diagnose the real problem you’re having with your furniture selection, Kathy. It’s not easy being the truthsayer, but someone has to.
The problem is your husband. I’ve been with my wife for 18 years, and she is my best friend. I have learned how to shop with my wife.
Beth: “Do you like these chairs?”
Me (stalling): “Hmmm.”
Beth: “I like those chairs better.”
Me: “Me too.”
Done. Maybe I’ll hire myself out as a “husband shopping partner.” I could probably make a killing.
November 27th, 2007 at 9:20 pm
I’m so glad that you got full credit. However, does that refer to the dreaded store credit, or your actual money back so that you can continue shopping for some real ballsy lamps?
November 28th, 2007 at 2:55 am
Me too on the “drunken feng shui eclectic”. Hilarious!
I can never find anything anywhere. I hate to shop so if I have to, I do as much as I can online. At least I can have my music and cup o’tea to decrease the pain.
November 27th, 2007 at 10:43 pm
@ Lotus07 — You are so right. The amount of time and energy wasted was staggering. I don’t know what we’ll do now. I feel like just ordering online, but I always prefer seeing an item in person before buying. I dread the thought of searching again, but we really need the lamps. This whole thing got so stupid I could scream!
@ Frogster — Shopping must be a breeze for you. So are you saying you’re going to help me find lamps? Don’t toy with me. I’m desperate. BTW, this was my fault in the end, because Dave would have been perfectly happy with the on/off switch type lamp. I insisted on the pull chains. I want to shoot myself in the head now.
@ Ann — We got the charge reversed on our credit card. No store credit, thankfully. We did buy a floor lamp from them, but didn’t like the shade. To get a different one, we traded in the first shade for only 50% cash back!!! Then had to buy another one at full price. I don’t like their business tactics. A wonder they can stay in business.
November 28th, 2007 at 10:34 am
@ Windyridge — I managed to do 100% of my Christmas shopping online last year and will do the same this year. Not sure how I ever survived shopping without the Internet. God bless Amazon.com.
November 28th, 2007 at 11:58 am
Ohhh, what’d ya get me? (looks in fake internet bag) I’m guessing it might be… money?? =)
I got a new coat because the button on the other one fell off. Aeropostale is so nice. xD
November 28th, 2007 at 12:16 pm
@ Regan – Yep. You’re getting something from the Like Jar. Lots and lots of quarters.
November 28th, 2007 at 4:09 pm
Hi Kathy,
Sorry I can’t help you find new lamps. My wife is the one who does the furniture shopping, bargains for cars, even the home we currently reside in, and she is a killer shark. Sales people, even he cocky ones with brass balls learn right away that she’s an informed and stubborn consumer who will walk away from any sale, no matter how far into she is if things don’t suit her. We had a situation like yours with a sofa we purchased when we lived in an apartment and those guys still get nosebleeds whenever they meet someone with her first name. I hope you eventually find what you want. BTW I personally think it is eclectic and pretty decorative to have the TV on the coffee table. We don’t even have a coffee table in our den as it was destroyed by two children with a fondess for magic markers and Elmers Glue. Talk to you soon. PS. Drop me an e-mail from my blog and I’ll give you the details of the 3 column blog design as you asked for in your comment. I’m happy to help. -Mike
November 28th, 2007 at 4:46 pm
I have tears running down my cheeks from laughing my way through this post. I feel like I’m either Beavis or Butthead…
“huhuhuh…she said balls…huhuhuhuh”
I’m glad everything worked out and you got your full refund. Isn’t it amazing how much “customer no-service” seems to be the mode of operation for so many businesses today?
November 28th, 2007 at 10:15 pm
@ Mike — Kudos to your wife for sticking to her guns. I did that once while buying a car. I got exactly what I wanted because I went head to head with the salesman. He didn’t know what hit him. But it was different with the lamp lady because I knew I didn’t have any wiggle room, and I was tired. I never made eye contact her while having the brass balls conversation. I’m just thrilled Dave took care of the shades situation. If I’d gone, it might have ended very ugly. He’s a much more patient person than I am.
As to the ruined furniture, we should have been smart enough to know the cats would have their way with it. We are dumb sometimes.
@ Lee — Glad you liked my ballsy post. Hee-hee. She said balls again.
We were lucky in this case. I really thought they were going to make a case for only a partial refund, since they had to pay for shipping. We dodged a bullet.
November 30th, 2007 at 1:50 am
Hi, Kathy, I can’t help you with your brass balls, but if you just find the lamps you want except that they aren’t pull chain, get them and it’s really a trivial matter to change the inner socket to a pull chain type. A hardware store or one of the big box stores such a Lowe’s or Home Depot will have inner sockets, $3-$4. If you handle computer innards, this is something you can easily figure out and do. Or get a book on electricity that includes lamp wiring.
The big box stores will also have a fair number of lampshades, sold separately. BTW, for hanging lamps, get the lampshade you want first, then get a pendant kit.
—
Your advice to windyridge about firefox and adblock was dead on! I suggested she also use NoScript.
November 30th, 2007 at 3:04 pm
Lesle — Those are some really great ideas! Thanks for suggesting them. I guess we never thought about going the “do it yourself” route, but we may have to. I’m not kidding — we looked for about a month for lamps. Time for a new approach.
July 16th, 2009 at 11:58 am
The furniture arrangement here looks better then before. I hope you were able to get it all worked out. Looks like the cat is enjoying the new chair.
Wrought Iron Furniture’s last blog post..Homepage Large Pics
November 15th, 2009 at 7:38 am
Looks like a nice, cosy room to me. The big comfy chair looks like the ideal place to spend time on the laptop, very nice indeed.
January 7th, 2010 at 6:51 am
Me too on the “drunken feng shui eclectic”. Hilarious!