How a Cat Gets the Last Word
cats April 8th, 2012Meet Shadow.
Shadow has a habit of pooping when she rides in a car.
Every. Single. Time. It’s all we’ve ever known.
In fact, the day my husband and I picked her up from her foster mom, she dropped a bomb a mile out.
We had 20 more miles to go.
At some point we pulled over so I could clean her up a little and toss the smelly offense.
Dogs may like sticking their heads out the window doing 65, but that’s not a good look for humans.
Wednesday she had to go to the vet.
I explained to Shadow that we were going to try a new thing.
We were going to diaper her so that she doesn’t mess in the carrier and so we don’t have to choke to death when she poops.
Shadow said “Sure, silly woman. You can give it a whirl, but I wouldn’t count on anything.”
She miraculously allowed me to slip her tail through a hole in the diaper, wrap it around her butt and tape it at her belly.
Feeling all smug about how easy it was, I placed her in the carrier and off we went.
Things went well for the first three of four miles, save for her relentless I’m in a car, in a diaper and you’ll pay for this meowing.
And then.
And then we smelled it.
She pooped. Like clockwork, at mile four.
Huh. I wonder why we can smell it so much. Shouldn’t it all be contained in the diaper? Or most of it?
We get to the vet’s office and soon discover that Shadow was right. We shouldn’t have expected this to work.
Because at some point she must have busted out of her diaper and pooped all over herself anyway.
And that’s how a cat lets you know diapers are for babies and pet parents may be well-intentioned, but they are also quite stupid.
Stumble it!
April 8th, 2012 at 8:16 am
my cat does the same thing. Last time I waited and scooped her up just after she had been in the box. Didn’t help, she still had some left just for the car ride…
April 8th, 2012 at 9:59 am
Kathy, this post is HILARIOUS!
LOVE the shot of Shadow in the diaper. And even though it didn’t work, I think it’s GENIUS that you tried!
My cats never pooped when I took them to the vet in my car, but they did MEOW and WHINE very LOUDLY!
Happy Easter, my friend…X
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April 8th, 2012 at 11:09 am
I take mt dog everywhere. Quick trips to the grocery store..dog park almost daily…this dog has her own seatbelt shes in the car so much. Yet, somehow, every single time we are going to the vet, she howls. I have no clue how she knows (it’s the same path as the dry cleaner). It’s A VERY LOUD people-stare-at-the-stoplights-howl.
April 8th, 2012 at 11:42 am
Sorry your good idea did not work. But even if it did work, I don’t think Shadow would like having the diaper hold the poop in. It is meant to drop AWAY from the body!
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April 8th, 2012 at 12:28 pm
That’s just insane. I have never known a cat to do that e v e r y s i n g l e time lol
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April 8th, 2012 at 12:48 pm
When I started to read this, my first thought was “It’s just gonna get all smooshed on her butt….and all that fur. Blech!”
Before we got married, Joe would travel with his cat to come visit me for the weekend. While she was a great traveler–she had to poopie on the ride too. He finally put a small litter box on the floor in the back seat for her–which made her (and him) a LOT happier. You may want to try that next time, but that would mean that she would be loose in the car until she went poopie. But I’m thinking that you could put her back in the crate after she poops, because you’d be stopping to dump that stinky poo-poo anyway, right? Or maybe you could get a larger crate that would allow for a litter box inside–just set it on the seat in the back or something.
I hope it works. I’m sure the cat ain’t happy with this either.
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April 8th, 2012 at 3:07 pm
leah g — Saving the best for last?
Ron — The whining is almost worse than the pooping, isn’t it? It’s like they think we’re killing them. Very painful to listen to. I’m just glad our vet is only 4 miles away. And that it’s much quieter on the way home! Loved your latest “All Creatures Great and Small” post. Especially the squirrel.
Daughterbonnie — Yeah! How do they know? They must have special radar for heading to The Bad Place (that’s what we call it).
Daisy the Curly Cat — And that’s why she’s so smart to rip that thing off! We though the lesser of two evils would be poop on the butt instead of poop on the butt AND on the feet. So much for trying new ideas.
blueyes — We called her foster mom after we got home and said “She pooped in the car on the way home,” and the foster mom said “Oh, I forgot to tell you that. She poops in the car. Nothing you can do about it.” Well, OK then.
lin — Well, our thinking was at least the smoosh would be limited only to her butt instead of also on her feet, which is much harder to clean off. I love the litter box idea, but we don’t have a truck and there’s no room in the car. No, Shadow was not happy with this arrangement and told us so. Poor thing.
April 8th, 2012 at 5:31 pm
Pet diapers make as much sense as diapers for the elderly. Sadly, I have had a similar experience — with MY FATHER! Unlike your cat, he never warned me that it was coming. A total surprise. This really happened. Thanks dad…
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April 8th, 2012 at 5:52 pm
You know that Sukie does exactly the same thing. Every time we take her to the vets she is smothered in poo! It’s so embarrassing, but the vets don’t seem to mind. I expect they’re used to it. You thought a diaper would help? There is no way our cats would let us put one of those on them!
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April 9th, 2012 at 5:33 am
Ugggh, sorry. Thunder pees in the car, but it’s actually not that bad as long as there’s a towel in his carrier to absorb it.
I’m impressed you got the diaper on in the first place. And I have to ask — what’s that design on it? It looks like a bunch of scattered gray bricks.
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April 9th, 2012 at 5:42 am
I knew that wasn’t going to work right away! No cat is going to put up with that. I suggest you find a vet closer to home, or else just don’t feed her less than 12 hours before your appointment.
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April 9th, 2012 at 6:55 am
Switch a vet who is less than 4 miles from your house.
April 9th, 2012 at 8:38 am
You make me laugh! Poor cat! LOL….
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April 9th, 2012 at 8:57 am
Funny, none of the publicist’s cats have ever done this and she has had a herd of cats in her lifetime so she cannot offer any advice. Except maybe not to feed Shadow the night before.
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April 9th, 2012 at 12:31 pm
I have used a “Mobile Vet” almost exclusively for our cat, Smokey. He gets too traumatized being put in the carrier. My doc actually does his exam on Smokey laying on the floor of my closet. I feel bad for your kitty.
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April 9th, 2012 at 3:14 pm
Poor shadow!!!
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April 10th, 2012 at 7:25 am
Shadow looks just like my cat!! That is so funny that you put a diaper on your cat. Maybe you’re onto something. Is their a niche market for kitty diapers???
April 10th, 2012 at 11:34 am
I once had a cat that would begin barfing before you got all the way out the driveway. Nor would she cease until some time after reaching a standstill. Sometimes her other bodily processes would also shut down for some time.
My other cat at the time did nothing so noxious, but she knew instinctively when she was going to the vet. If a vet visit was pending AND NO OTHER TRIP, she would begin to shed as if all the hair in her body were shouting “Abandon cat” until she was all but obscured by a cloud of cat fur.
I’ve never seen anything like that.
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April 10th, 2012 at 2:25 pm
Poor Shadow! Do you have a mobile vet in your area? Then she wouldn’t have to ride anywhere! Mine don’t poop but they fill the car with the sound of death threats!
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April 10th, 2012 at 10:29 pm
Next time try duct taping a baby bottle to her ass. Can’t hurt.
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April 11th, 2012 at 11:37 am
Very funny but exhilarating. This is the main reason why I don’t want cats at home but if you’re really an animal lover, you’ll be able to deal when a cat poops. How old is your sweetie cat right now?
-Serena
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April 12th, 2012 at 3:09 pm
The obvious solution is to transport your cat on the back of a bicycle. This will annihilate all car-related stress.
April 12th, 2012 at 3:10 pm
Oh, and it will prevent nausea, as motion sickness only occurs when the animal cannot see the horizon. It may be that your cat was just car sick.
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April 12th, 2012 at 3:15 pm
What a lovely cat, she is really beautiful… I do love black and I have a pet like her, namely “Shrez”…
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April 12th, 2012 at 5:36 pm
I’d like to tell you that this is not the norm but I can’t. Having worked with vets for years, we depend on the “car trip” to produce a sample. Otherwise we have to take one by others means and usually bandages are involved… for us. Sorry about the smell 🙁
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April 26th, 2012 at 3:41 pm
UNREAL!!!!!!!!!
The pooping part. Not the diaper part. That was sheer genius. Your proto-type just needs some tweeking
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