Recipe for a Blog Post
Blogging, food, Fun January 24th, 2009This is a recipe for my world famous Serviceable Post. It’s what you get when I only have tidbits that don’t make real posts. Consider it the casserole of blogging.
Combine all ingredients in a word processor on medium speed and let sit. Time to prepare: 30 minutes. Serves everyone.
Ingredients:
1 observation: I have a new man in my life. His name is Brawny. I always thought Brawny paper towels were like Bounty’s little brother who always stood in its shadow. I was wrong. Thick and strong, these manly paper towels can stand up to any mess and then some. Brawny, I’m sorry I never gave you a chance until now. Forgive me?
1 question: Every morning when I get in my car to drive to work, I have to raise the rear-view mirror. When I leave work, I have to lower it. I’ve read our spines can elongate as much as an inch overnight while sleeping. I’m guessing this is why all the readjusting. Do you have to do this too, or am I the only one with a yo-yo spine?
1 celebrity sighting: A friend of mine got in line behind Paul Sorvino at the grocery store last night and got up the nerve to talk to him. She’s still kicking herself for saying she loved him in the TV comedy Still Standing. He’s thinking What? No Goodfellas?
A pinch of stupid: I bought a thin baguette at the store yesterday, still warm and crispy out of the oven. I carried it to the checkout register under my arm, it broke in half and the top part fell out of the bag and onto the floor in front of about twenty people.
A clerk was summoned to get me a new one and when he brought it over said with a wink "The crust is really crisp. Be careful." I guess my guns are stronger than I thought. Apparently you do not want to mess with me.
2 gloves: My husband’s had a cold for a week and is trying not to get his germ-ridden fingers on anything I touch. Thanks, dear. But isn’t it hard to type like that?
By the way, I’ve been downing Airborne tablets like I do whenever I’m around sick people. I know the FDA says it’s a crock of poo, but I haven’t had a cold in almost five years. Coinkydink? I think snot.
Stumble it!
January 26th, 2009 at 2:56 pm
Thank GOD, Kathy you didn’t CUT your ARM off with that bread! Did you know accidental arm amputation due to overly crisp baguette afflicts one in thirty?
How do you think the one-armed man from the Fugitive got that way?
True story! 🙂
Jenn Thorson’s last blog post..Office Pranks, Pens, and the Shrinkwrap Trap
January 26th, 2009 at 3:40 pm
If you would have said “Bake in the oven and stick a pound of butter on top” i would have thougt you were paula dean with all that love.
January 26th, 2009 at 6:01 pm
Came over from carolesthoughtfulspot. Good post. When I was newly married and in college, we of course had little money (since DW was the sole bread winner and supporting me through college). It was so cold in our apartment because we couldn’t afford to turn our electric heat on in the winter that I wore those stretch gloves on my hands while I was doing my homework on the computer. Yes – it’s difficult to type, but you gotta do what ya gotta do.
January 26th, 2009 at 6:09 pm
David — Oh, I fart too. Oh, wait. I misread that. Sorry.
Dorothy Stahlnecker — I’m waiting for the day when my doctor tells me I’m officially shrinking. “Casserole brain.” I’m stealing that.
Trade Show Guru Steve — Don’t yell at me. I don’t think we have a Costco! I’ve heard of them, but I don’t know where to find it! I freaked out today. I feel like I’m getting sick. I think I’m paranoid. We’ll see in the morning. If I’m sick, I’m rescinding my support of Airborne.
Don — Oh, I love that! Are you sure he wasn’t just hoping he’d get kissed all day long wearing mistletoe?
stinkypaw — True true! I don’t care either. As long as I’m not snotty and coughing, I don’t care what’s in it or not.
ettarose — On the way home tonight, I had to purposely sit up straight. I guess the job squashed me a little today. I would have stared at Halle Berry’s boobs, too. That woman has an unnaturally good chest. No fair!
dizzblnd — Yo. It’s the fo shizzle for sure. Whatever works!
Musing — No, your shirts are. I was a little squat today when I left work. Was a hard day, so maybe everyone’s right about what our jobs are doing to us. Taking years off our lives and making us shorter.
JD at I Do Things — I always thought Brawny was the cheapo brand, but they’re not! How did I get this old without knowing that?? Generic paper towels should be removed from the market. You wind up using two sheets anyway. Might as well go for Brawny man!
absepa — Don’t worry, my dear. You’ll be out of your writing funk soon! I’m rooting for ya. I haven’t heard of Zicam. Thanks for the tip!
Mrs. Mecomber — I hope you have good success with it. I drank a lot of it this afternoon because I had to work on a laptop that belonged to a woman who was leaking snot all over the place. She didn’t even have a tissue. Just used her hand to wipe her nose. I was thoroughly disgusted. I hosed myself down as soon as I got back to my office.
PaulsHealthBlog.com — One time I dropped a glass jar of spaghetti sauce. The splatter looked like a CSI episode. I was mortified. Eggs are good, too, though. Nice and messy! Never heard of Pops. I’m so glad for these recommendations. I’ll have to look for it.
Momo — I think you might be right. I was really squat when I left work tonight. Had to purposely sit up straight to see the mirror properly. My job is making me shorter.
Comedy Plus — Oh, man. What’s it gonna be like when I’m 70? I’m going to be one of those old ladies who can’t see over the steering wheel! Yes, of course there is a crowd. Nothing stupid ever happens to me when no one’s watching.
Jenn Thorson — “Woman Loses Arm in Bread Mishap” Film at eleven.
brooke — Paula Dean keeps the entire butter industry churning, I’m convinced.
Kevin — Holy crap. Sounds brutal. I didn’t have a lot of heat (or food) in my first years living away from home. Yes, you gotta suck it up, but years later I’ve never forgot the feeling of doing without. Makes me more appreciative for the simple things. Hope you’re not wearing gloves anymore!
January 26th, 2009 at 6:59 pm
No, I don’t have to readjust my mirror twice a day, unless my husband’s been driving the main car. I think you may be the only yo yo… :o)
Mary @ Holy Mackerel’s last blog post..Ahoy Matey!
January 26th, 2009 at 9:00 pm
Join the club!!
January 27th, 2009 at 12:01 am
Princess Gail and I just finished watching a TV movie with Mira Sorvino. She must take after her mother, don’t you think so? Just saying.
“I think snot” made me laugh out loud!
January 27th, 2009 at 12:31 am
Did the gloves help?
amber’s last blog post..Home Shopping Network
January 27th, 2009 at 9:29 am
I don’t care if the paper towels are made of recycled used toilet paper – I LOVE THE BRAWNY MAN! A year or so ago the Brawny website had these screensavers you could download and they had this one of the Brawny man in front of a fireplace. It was HOT.
Carole’s last blog post..Photo Essay of What We’re Doing Today
January 27th, 2009 at 10:44 am
I don’t have a problem of moving my mirror, it fell off some time ago and nothing will stick it back to the windscreen, not even superglue!!
Oh yea the Brawny guy is hunky 😉
Karen @ Blazing Minds’s last blog post..Saturday Six – Health & Fitness
January 27th, 2009 at 6:53 pm
Ok- I’ll mess with you despite the fact that you are loaded in the guns department. Next time you break a baguette under your arm flex and or cup your other hand under your pit and make pit fart noises- in this way you will let the whole grocery store know not to mess with you because
A) You can break thin pieces of bread with your brawny (wo)man guns
B) They will not want to mess with you because they will now think you are mental after making pit noises
C) They are afraid you might snap on them like the plastic woman with your yo yo spine
D) All of the above.
Michelle Gartner’s last blog post..Vintage Toaster Bacon & High School Wrestling
January 27th, 2009 at 7:26 pm
Have you seen the latest commercials from the Airborne Lady? She sounds mad that she sold her business and the new owner wasn’t doing it justice.
January 27th, 2009 at 9:27 pm
Our Mom’s been doing airborne every day since she started feeling like she was getting a cold. She likes the nighttime one that you heat up.
We’re sorry about your baguette, Mom would have volunteered to help you eat the leftovers!!
Sniffie and the Florida Furkids
Sniffie and the Florida Furkids’s last blog post..Toes Tuesday with Allie
January 28th, 2009 at 1:12 am
Paul Sorvino,the only movie I know him from is Good fellas.I’d probably say something like. Yo,whats up Uncle Pauly,hows the crew?
Sorry to hear about your baguette,I hate when that happens.Ha Ha.
Gregorio’s last blog post..SPRING TIME BLOSSOM
January 28th, 2009 at 5:50 am
Mary at Holy Mackerel — I’m a yo yo in more ways than one.
brooke — It’s not necessarily a bad thing.
Ferd — I agree. She got lucky there. For the record, I think I’m getting sick. I have a weird cough, but not sniffling or sneezing. I’m trying to will it away.
amber — Not sure. I’ve been around two other sick people and now I think I have something. Just a cough, but it’s something.
Carole — Oh, man. I didn’t know Brawny Man was GQ material. I’d like to see the woman with that screen saver try to explain it.
Karen at Blazing Minds — How do you drive then??? Your head must be killing you all that turning around!
Michelle Gartner — LMAO! I think that’d be the first time any woman in history has ever made fart noises with her arm pit. I think it’s strictly a guy thing.
Karen — No, I haven’t (mostly because I fast forward through all commercials). Interesting. But she had to have made a lot of money in the sale. She should let it go.
Sniffie and the Florida Furkids — I didn’t know they had a nighttime one. I’m feeling a little sick this morning. Been around a few more sick people since the weekend. I’m afraid Airborne didn’t save me, although what I have is just a touch. Maybe it’s keeping me from getting a full-blown cold?
Gregorio — My friend said he was very friendly and chatted with her a little bit. He’s probably heard every Goodfellas reference over the years, but I bet he’s a good sport about it.
January 29th, 2009 at 2:50 pm
My father once ran into Bob Hope at an airport an actually said to him:
“You look so familiar to me. Where do I know you from?” when Bob said, “I don’t know” my father said, “Do I look familiar to you?” LOL I was so glad I was not there.
February 6th, 2009 at 7:19 pm
Jessica — Awesome. I’m sure Bob got a huge kick out of that. Hey, it’s more fun than what he probably usually got.
March 10th, 2009 at 12:23 am
Wow. Now then I know what commentluv does. lol. I’ve been hearing about it but do not fully understand what is so good about it.
March 20th, 2009 at 8:33 am
very intresting