The Junk Drawer

Yesterday I took my oversized comforter to the laundromat. Y’all know how much I love the laundromat.

Nothing remarkable happened there except for the guy in neon orange sneakers who lifted the lid to his washing machine about twelve times during one cycle to, I don’t know, see if his socks were all getting along in there. Dude, it’s OK. They know how to mingle.

After my visit, I decided to make a run to the store. Since I didn’t have paper and pen with me, I used the Notes program on my iPod Touch to make my list.

Oooooo! Electronic grocery list. So convenient.

Except…..

When I walked the length of the store for something I hadn’t tapped out and worried I’d forget, this happened.

Apparently, my swinging hand action caused me to hit all kinds of buttons and suddenly I had a new grocery list.

Great. Now we’re having pasta for dinner, with Ld and Q on the side.

I remembered only half of the rest of the list I’d created.

And then when I got home I saw that I’d been hitting the enter key the whole time, so the rest of my list was there, just way down at the bottom out of view.

Whatever, technology. You suck.

Who’s peekin’ out from over the tree tops?

Smilin’ at everybody she sees?

Who’s reaching out to capture a moment?

Everyone knows it’s Windy!

Hi there, Windy! It was a long summer and we missed you. What’s that, you say? Not feelin’ too good?

Oh, don’t worry. Everyone feels their age when they get older. You still look good to us!

It was a rough road getting half-decent pictures of our Windy yesterday. Three different cameras, two dozen stills, and five videos. Crouching down by the roof wall, I did my best to capture what’s left of her.

At one point, I wanted to contact a professional photographer on staff where I work, someone with better skills and a better camera, but I was stymied by the thought of how I would explain the picture I needed taken. Not everyone understands.

But you do. You all understand.

I’m not sure what the future holds. Her third birthday will come in April. There have been murmurings of having funeral services for Windy, but I can’t bear the thought.

I’d rather celebrate her longevity with another cake and a party than somber music and tears for her passing.

Let’s pretend she’ll live forever, OK?

…. and Windy has wings to fly

Above the clouds….. above the clouds!!!!

I used to say the one thing I can’t live without was Internet access. That’s true most of the time, but as of 1:42PM today, the new thing I can’t do without is quick-drying clothes.

Our Kenmore up and died today. Rest in peace, 19-yr-old heavy duty front-loader, model #96273800. You served us well.

The panic didn’t set in right away. For an hour I thought I could manage. Maybe try to dry clothes in it with just cool air. We get cool air. But a single blanket we ran through a full cycle didn’t even get half dry.

I have two options: 1) Buy a new dryer and pray it gets delivered within 24 hours, or 2) Go to a laundromat until it does.

Option #2 is not a happy option. I would rather scoop my eyes out with a melon baller than sit in a laundromat watching my pants dry. And I’m not one of those people who puts their stuff in the machines and leaves to run errands. I have clothing separation anxiety. No, I don’t actually think someone will steal my clothes, but I kind of do.

Also, I feel so weird exposing my clothes in a public setting. Yes, yes, I know I wear them in public. I just don’t want to wash them in public.

This leaves Option #1. And that means I’m taking my sister’s advice and going to the same family-run store where she bought her washer/dryer and got them delivered the same day.

I will be there when they open Monday morning. Waiting with a credit card in hand. I will step inside, point at the first dryer I see and buy it. I will ask if I can have it that day and hug them if they say yes.

If they don’t, then it’s to the laundromat, where random people doing there laundry run the risk of seeing my clothes, and that includes these shorts. Don’t judge me. You know you have something that looks just like it.

OK, so you know how it this blog works, right? I tell you everything about me, but then I occasionally ask you to spill the beans about yourselves.

I love reading about my readers!

Here’s today’s curiosity….

What are you an expert at? If someone asked you what you’re really good at, what would you say? It doesn’t have to be what you do for a living.

Are you a restaurant-quality cook? Can you fix any plumbing problem with just a screwdriver? Can you finish a Sunday New York Times crossword puzzle? Does every picture you take come out perfect the first time?

I wanna know what’s your thing. What do people always say you’re the best at? Don’t be shy!

Go!

Any cashiers out there? Gather ‘round for class. Today’s lesson is brief and simple.

What I’m about to tell you is something you should have learned in cashier kindergarten, but bears repeating.

Ready?

When giving change to customers, always, always, always give them coins first, then place bills on top.

Why?

Because the customer only has so many hands. They need to put the coins in a pocket or wallet. By putting the coins on top of bills, the customer risks spilling coins as they attempt to drop them in whatever coin-carrying vessel they have on their person.

They are likely trying to do this with the other hand holding the thing, let’s say Lay’s Salt & Vinegar potato chips, that they just bought.

I repeat. Do not try to balance coins on bills as you extend them to customers. If you’re having problems balancing coins, what will the customer do?

The customer will spill them all over the counter and the floor, watch a dime and a quarter roll away spastically under a refrigerator, curse you under her breath and wonder why you thought that handing her a shaky pile of bills and coins as though you were passing her plutonium would end well.

So, to recap.

Coins in the palm.

Bills on the top.

Receipt when customer has deposited her change in her wallet.

Class dismissed.

p.s. For an insider’s look at the other side of the equation, check out the most excellent Confessions of a Cashier blog for insight into what it’s like dealing with the general public. This woman has all my pity.